Blockchain is is one of the greatest revolutionary technologies of our time. A trustless, distributed ledger, blockchain has the potential to completely upend the way society functions, from the financial world all the way to how our politics operates. Below is a list of the 10 most exciting use cases offered by this new technology.
1. Hold Blockchain-Backed Sovereign Control Over Your $100 Net Worth
Like many successfully professionals, you have a massive $100 net worth. It occasionally dips into negative values when you have to pay for a tire replacement. This is all well and good, but your 10th percentile stash is under threat from the sovereign of the land.
How do you take control of this nest egg that you’ve spent the past several weeks building up? The answer is bitcoin. With cryptocurrency, your money is safely within your control, at least until you get locked out of your coinbase account.
2. Buying The Top
Your annoying coworker Fred put $50 into an obscure dog coin 3 months ago, and has seen his investment go up to $80,000. You’ve been waiting for weeks for a crash to happen, but to no avail. Not wanting to miss out, you finally relent and put $1000 into the coin.
What you didn’t realize is that Fred and his friends look at your buying as a sign of the top, so they all end up pulling out of the coin. Your stash is now worth 5 cents, but at least you learned a lot about investing!
3. Selling the Dip
You hold on to your 5 cent stake in the dog coin for the next six months, hoping a round two run up will happen. Unfortunately, your 5 cent stake becomes a 1 cent stake. You don’t want to lose that final penny. You also are hoping to bake in some losses for tax purposes, so you relent and sell your stake. The next day the coin goes up by 2000%. But at least you learned a lot about investing.
4. Non-Copyright Enforceable Monkey GIFs Backed By Blockchain
What’s the use of having money if you don’t have a way to show it off? Wealthy boomers used to do things like buy sports cars, mansions, and go on exotic vacations. The new generation, however, takes it to the next level. What’s more jealousy inducing than having an NFT of a monkey GIF as your twitter profile picture?
And if someone else starts using your monkey GIF as their own profile picture, you can threaten to sue them. Hopefully they’ll think you have a copyright on the image (which you don’t).
5. Track the Supply Chain of Household Consumables
A lot of collectibles are expensive because of their origin. The best wines, gemstones, and other expensive items get their value from their scarcity and geography of production. Unfortunately, it’s hard to track these qualities for soft commodities like wheat, flour, leafy greens, coco beans, and more. The good news is that blockchain combined with Internet of Things (IOT) technology can help everyday consumers track where their products come from.
And the best part of this the potential growth in the “snobbery market”. Now you can brag that your bread is made from the best flour west of the Mississippi, or that the kale in your salad was vintage plucked a whole six days ago. Aged like fine wine!
6. 100x Leverage “Beta Plays”
Like many seasoned investors, you understand the relationship between risk and returns in investing. And because of your unique financial circumstances, you think that putting 100x leverage on the next crypto project “going to the moon” will fit your current investment thesis.
Yes, your risk has gone up 100 fold, but so has your potential return profile! The only downside is potentially being in debt for the rest of your life. But this would only happen if your crypto position moves down by 1%.
7. Stable Coins Pegged to Sketchy Commercial Paper
When you’re making your expert crypto trades, it’s important to have a place to keep your “dry powder” between trades. You don’t want to keep this in something too volatile, so you need some type of asset which is pegged to the dollar. Fortunately, you found the perfect stable coin which will fit your needs.
And the good news is, the stablecoin is fully-backed dollar for dollar with something. You’re not sure what’s backing the coin, but it might be commercial paper issued by a 6 month old company somewhere in a foreign country. However, you trust that the management team behind the coin, who’ve never been seen in public, have your best interests in mind.
8. Lots of Obscure Acronyms on Twitter
Perhaps the greatest innovation attributable to blockchain technology is the development of a new dialect of the English language which consists of sentences almost completely made up of obscure acronyms. And with this new dialect, you can make fun of those who are NGMI because they weren’t able to HODL because of all of the FUD they were reading. So sad.
9. Blockchain Crowdfunding For Startups
You and your business partners have a great business idea. You pitched your idea to a few venture capitals and angel investors, but they did not like your plan. When you ask why they aren’t interested, they let you know that it’s important that the founder knows what “revenue” is and that products and services should exist for a company to function.
You scoff at their lack of vision, not realizing that you’re one of the best “idea” guys around. Fortunately, you spend the afternoon spinning up a new alt-coin to fund your idea. This nets you about $1m in funding, which you then spend over the next six months on office rent and “expensed” dinners.
10. Refreshing Your Crypto Portfolio Every 15 Seconds
You wanted the peace of mind of storing wealth in an asset safe from the inflationary pressures of fiat currencies. You wanted to be able to relax and focus on other things in life, like your family and your health. However, you now check your crypto portfolio at least 4000 times a day to see where it’s at.
You tweet “buy the dip” when it’s fallen 60% in a day, but as mentioned in #3 above, you sell the dip instead. You also sign up to follow crypto twitter accounts so that you can doom scroll through the FUD whenever the market is crashing.
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